Most of us light workers have many dark skeletons in our closets – the nature of who we are and the sensitivities we have often means we have a history of alcohol/drug use/misuse and/or mental illness…… side effects of being different where difference is not appreciated.
This forms part of the shadow aspects of ourselves, and the bits that we often try to hide away – they are the source of our shame. We can put a lot of energy into trying to keep these aspects under the radar – in the shadows… however they are always lurking in the background and are a source of great fear. They are a constant reminder of our various imperfections – how can we be light workers if we have these ugly blemishes within us?
That concept that light workers are perfect is utter rubbish – we are all human and very imperfect….. no exceptions!!!!!! My perspective is that we have been beaten and burnt as part of the tempering process that prepares us for our roles – when a black smith is making a sword, he/she heats and beats the metal to strengthen it – it is this tempering process that transitions a lump of iron into a blade of steel – it is this firing and beating that allows the blade to be polished to shine – without it the brightness of the shine will never come.
Be proud of your experiences – not that you made dumb choices at times, more that with them you are able to put judgment of others to one side. Those experiences give you empathy to support others through times when they are not making such good choices in their lives. Those experiences also give you the confidence to guide others out of their darkness – you have done it, you are living proof it is possible. Those experiences give you street cred – you know because you have lived it – you are not just spruiking something you have learned out of a book or from someone else.
Owning and sharing those experiences give others hope and faith, that they too, may find the light some day. So, choose to stop fearing the experiences of your past, and bring them into who you are. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you put them front and centre in neon lights, it does mean, however, that you don’t deny them anymore. In choosing to do this you are lightening your load by owning your past, and your light shines brighter and your world becomes better.