20 years ago, psychologist Arthur Aron put two strangers together in his laboratory, in an experiment to make them fall in love. The experiment worked so well that only only did the two people fall in love, it also piqued the interest of many people around the world.
This included Mandy Len Catron, who wrote about her own experiences in the New York times with the her article titled ” To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This.” The article talks about Mandy’ quest to use the 36 questions, that were laid out by Dr Arnon. Her objective was clear, she wanted to make anyone fall in love with her.
Mandy decided to try the experiment with an acquaintance from her local University. The male was an obliging one and soon the two began going over the 36 questions at the local bar. The questions started out lighthearted, yet soon became very personal and the idea was to forge a connection between two people, that would usually take weeks, if not months to create.
Dr Arnon’s study study is extremely fascinating and definitely works best if you try it with a complete stranger, however author Mandy Len Catron, choose to do it with someone she already briefly knew. The final part of the expirment consists of staring into the eyes of your potential partner for 4 minutes straight.
If you Google Dr Arnon’s questions you will find 36 questions. The questions will start off lighthearted and then quickly go into more deeply personal questions. There is three different parts or sets to the exercise and in total it should take about an hour and a half to complete.
Some may find the questions probing and at times even awkward, yet the idea is that the more that you ease into the questions, the more you open up and are willing to reveal your true self.
The questions begin with things like ” Would you like to be famous? In what way? ”
And ” What would constitute a perfect day for you?”
By the 3rd set, things start to get more deep and meaningful, with questions like ” When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
” Of all the people in your family,whose death would you find the most disturbing? Why?”
If you agree to undertake the experiment, the idea is that you will learn a lot more about yourself and at the same time learn all about your prospective partner. If you are willing to participate in the final challenge ” where you look into the person’s eyes for 4 minutes,” as cliche as it may sound, you may just find yourself staring into the windows of your future mates soul.
Although you may not necessarily be able to choose who loves you, anyone that is willing and able to participate in an experiment such as this, show will show an openness that allows anything to happen.
Love first begins with a want, then an underlying need and ultimately we all hope to end up with somebody who not only listens to us, yet understands us on a deeper level and one that allows us to reveal our true selves. It may just take us a lot of questions and answers to get there.